Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Another one bites the dust

So another day gone by in a blink of an eye. And in this great big city time goes by even faster. I went out with the boys to buy milk and it amazes me how people see you coming down the sidewalk pushing a double stroller and don't bother moving to the side to go around you but expect you to go around them. Let me say now, if you have been hit by a double stroller within the last year by a woman pushing around two beautiful boys then I am so not sorry because you deserve it for being a dumbass and not moving out my way. Most people, because it really isn't everyone, are so into themselves and what they are thinking that they have no clue what their surroundings are. Wake up and smell the coffee people, there is a great big world that really does exist and your losing out on so much that is passing you by and you don't even notice.
So once I came home, I sat back to relax a bit and watched the boys play with each other. My big one tries so hard to get my little one to play with him that it makes me feel bad. He is only three and he doesn't under that his one year old brother can't do what he does. My son is a natural acrobat. He loves flipping and jumping and all that good stuff to give me heart attack every minute of everyday. Living in this great big city, I am fortunate enough to live in a home where my boys have room to roam and not feel cramped. So in turn my son can flip and jump and do as he loves. Of course he didn't learn this on his own. He watches a certain TV program with a "superhero" in a blue costume that saves people and does all these acrobatic moves. So he tries to get his brother involved only to be disappointed but at least he put a show on for him. My little guy is just starting to stand. Yes, a bit late, but hey better late than never. It is so cute to see his face when he does stand because you see his look of accomplishment all over his face. I can only wonder what goes through his mind. Hopefully by the end of the year he'll be walking and following his brother around the house.
Well another day gone by that was better than yesterday but not a great as tomorrow. Today I would like to end by saying that my heart goes out to the family and friends of the great Patrick Swayze. He was and always will be my Johnny. An amazing actor who's work will go on forever and forever will he be in all of our hearts. Rest in Peace.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

Where did time go?

Have you ever woken in the morning and thought to yourself "where did all the time go." That was me this morning. Time flies by so fast that you leave the house and you get back without even knowing what you did, just that 8 hours past in a blink of an eye. So here I am two boys and a husband later and living life in the fast lane. You know that lane, it's the lane we all searched for when we were younger but never really found until we fell and landed on it, yeah that one. Now don't take it the wrong way, I'm not complaining about my life I'm just stating facts. I can still close my eyes and see myself waking up at 5:30am to be ready and waiting at the bus stop by 6:05am so I didn't miss my bus to school. And just like that everything I wanted when I was younger fell into my lap. It's been almost ten years since I graduated high school and no I didn't graduate college, I never got degree and no I don't work, in a place where I get paid at least. My job, my boss' are my children. No one has a harder, more demanding job than a mom. I don't get time off, paid vacations, sick days, hell I don't even get off of work. I work 24/7 all year long.
Before my children were born I saw things differently. I would have woken up whenever I wanted, done whatever I wanted that day and not thought twice about it. Now I have to double think ever little step I take to make sure it's good for them. I love it though. It is what I was meant to do in life. I stopped at two all because my babies were big. The first was 9lbs. 11oz. and the second was 9lbs. 01oz. Yeah and me being a petite figure didn't help the situation. With my first, when I was at the end people stopped there car when I was walking down the street to ask if I was have twins. It was the funniest thing when I saw their faces when I said "No just one big baby." He was the one that left all my mommy marks on my body. He made all the room for his brother. And now he talks back to me. Seems like yesterday I was holding him in my arms for the first time and looking at his beautiful face and crying of pure joy. Now, he tells me to go away and not to look at him. He cracks me up in a way that no one has ever done. The innocence of a child is the most precious thing any person can experience. My first son was born two weeks after I stopped going into our bagel store that we had at the time. Two and a half months after, him and I were back in the store. Looking back now I feel bad for waking him so early and having him in the store all day but it helped make him who he is today. Everyone and anyone who entered those door made their way to see him even before ordering. It was amazing to see a baby have such control over so many people. Then when he started to stand, forget about it. He would call out to certain people when he saw them walk in through the door and they would go straight to him. He had them all eating out of the palm of his hand. We finally sold the store one month before I gave birth to my second son and yes I did work the store by myself while taking care of my son while my husband had already moved on to something else. I didn't mind, I pushed him to. I knew I was able to handle the store and the baby all on my own. The baby and I had a connection and still do. When the store would get busy is when he would take his naps and he knew to wake up just before the school girls came in to play with him. It was like clock work. How I did it, til this day I have no idea but I made it work. I think under my shirt was my Wonder Mom suit. You know the one, it's the one that curves to your body hiding all the weight gained from the pregnancy and gives you killer curves that you once had. Yeah that one.
So now I sit at home and wake every morning to a little boy staring at me, because of course my second son, who by the way turned one a month ago, still has his crib in my bedroom and another little boy coming into my room telling me"Mommy wake up, the sun is out! I want to see TV. Come with me, wake up." So let me go sleep while the boys are in bed and rest to see what tomorrow brings because I know it will be better than today as it always is. Life truly does get better with each passing day it's all in how you take in what life throws at you.